"Thursday will be better." --Alyssa

Today was the third say of my seventh semester.  The end is in sight.


So, the Wednesday before my final in chemistry.  I was miserable. I was freaking out over school,  and work, and money, and Alyssa going to Boston, and Joel being in limbo, and Stormy's silence, and Chelsey not being at school with me, and basically anything else I could think about to worry about.  I left my study group when my eye were filled with tears, I knew there was no point in crying in front of my study group--it was just time to go home.  I called Alyssa, she told me that Thursday would be better.  So, I spent the better part of an hour telling her that Thursday would not be better.  But in fact Thursday was better; Thursday was fantastic.

Clair and Ace chillin in the SUB first day of school.

That Thursday was a turning point.  It didn't fix the world, but enough things were fixed that the others are manageable. On that Thursday, I passed general chemistry.  On that Thursday, things with Stormy got better.  On that Thursday, I got  promoted to circulation--the job I've wanted for the past 4 1/2 years at the library.  And on Friday, Joel transferred to ULM.  Alyssa went to Boston, Chelsey's not at ULM, school is still expensive, and classes are still challenging, but its okay. That's life.  There's no such thing as perfect, but there's such thing as happy.

                                     

A baby anole my mom found.

Now, classes have started.  I'm excited for this semester. I'm ready to learn something new and interesting.

*~*Not-so-Fun Fact:  AIDS causes more death globally than car wrecks and war combined.*~*

I don't want to talk about it.

Hello World!  Remember me?!  I'm Clair and guess what?!!  Yep, you've guess it. Chemistry Camp is over.  How did I do? Not sure yet, all my marble are on this last test. 

First of all I would like to say a super huge thank you to everyone who has prayed, crossed their fingers, or sent me happy thoughts during the past month.  I'd also like to apologize to those who have been subjected to my bad moods, rants, or those who had to try and understand me between sobs.  Its funny how I have gone from crying hysterically curled up on Erin's sofa to literally dancing in the library in a matter of a couple hours.Thank ya'll for your patience and encouragement. 


Over the past month, most of y'all have probably heard me utter the phrase "I don't want to talk about it". Well, sometimes I just don't want to talk about something.  Maybe its because I don't want to think about that topic, maybe its because I know that I'll start crying if I talk about it, maybe its because I haven't organized my thoughts enough to know how I think about it, or simply maybe because I don't think its your business.  Just remember, me not wanting to talk about something doesn't necessarily mean I am shutting you out.

Okay, so that is as much I'm going to talk about "not talking about it".

*~*~*FUN FACT: The largest amphibian is a salamander from China coming in at a whooping 6ft long. *~*~*

Greetings from Camp Chemistry

The most challenging part about getting your wildlife biology degree isn't learning the organs of a crawfish, the Order, Family, Genus, and Species of Louisiana's mammals, or identifying flat worms.  Its not even learning to do a gram stain or catching turtles in Black Bayou.  Nor is it trigonometry, Spanish, or the geology class.  The most frustrating, tiring and down-right painful part about getting a biology degree is chemistry.

I know what  you are thinking, "Clair! you're a senior.  You're about to start your seventh semester and you only need four semesters of chemistry."  Well, not only an I taking this chemistry as a summer course, its not my last. I have two more to follow.

To be honest, chemistry scares me.  Chemicals, equilibria, equations, acids, bases, and carbons everywhere it scares me.  In previous semesters whenever I have had chemistry, especially the labs, I feel so sick.  My stomach is in knots and I want to just turn and run.  My nerves aren't as bad in the summer,  maybe its bc I know that I just have to get this class done or maybe its bc I have lab 3 afternoons a week and I don't have all weekend to get nervous about it.  Regardless, its nice to walk into the lab without having to puke. 

I have a C in the course right now.  I made an A in the first chem, but I am working my booty off for that class.  It makes me nervous to think that not only do I need to pass this class, but I have to have enough of an understanding to be able to do well in my organic chemistries. Its hard to care about a course when you know that you aren't going to use it in your career. I either want to work in a natural history museum or do field work.  Neither field seems like an understanding of bond angles or the Arrhenius equation is necessary, but whatever.  I have to understand it, so I can get my degree.  Not for my career, but for my degree.

So, to all my friends that haven't seen me lately, I'm sorry--chemistry is to blame.  Sry, I just have to learn this mess.  My final is Aug. the 11th, so I'll see ya'll after that.  Keep your fingers crossed and say a prayer for me!


**Fun Fact about Chemistry:  The letter J is the only letter not found on the periodic table.**

Leaving Hogwarts

The summer after fifth grade my mom bought me a relatively short paper-back book that I had no interest in reading.  Unfortunately, that year it was a required read in my sixth grade Language Arts class.  I had no idea  how much a children's book could change me life. It was about what it meant to be a true friend, about belonging, and about how family didn't always meant those kin to you.  Later as the book series, and I, matured, I realized it was also about choosing good or evil, how to thrive even when our past is a dark place, and it showed how sometimes the lines between good and evil can be blurry and confusing.  Some people may not let their children read these books bc the witch craft and the dark themes, and you know what I feel sorry for any child whose parent won't let them read a story about a boy who had all the reason in the world to turn out evil and cold-heart, but bc of love he chose the right choices and made earth better because of it. I feel like I have been on this journey with Harry Potter for a longer time and it sad to see it end.


Seeing the final installment of the Harry Potter phenomenon is bitter-sweet. I love how I was able to share this with my friends, but it was also hard to see it end.  After each book, I felt like Hogwarts was waiting on JK Rowling to finish  the next book so I could enter into its halls once more.  In a way its kind of like graduating high school.  You know that the memories will always be there, but it will never quite be the same; except, at least with high school the excitement of college was close to follow.  What's to follow Harry?


To be honest, the Harry Potter series isn't the best book series I've ever read, its not the best written, or even the most original, but in a way I think it helps define who I am in a small way.  Harry is the boy who lived, but I am a girl who grew up with that boy.  I think there will always be a part of me waiting for a half-giant with a magic umbrella to show up at the door. 

I'd like you thank JK Rowling for teaching me about true friendships and  the value of family, for telling the world that maybe the ones we think are bad are just misunderstood.  Thanks for not only giving us heroes like Harry who were destined for greatness, but for the heroes, like Neville, who became great.  Thanks for letting us Muggles share in the adventures of Hogwarts.

You can check out pics from our Harry Potter Party on my fb and on http://www.thenewsstar.com/ on the gallery section.

Mango Shaped-space

I had a fantastic trip to San Antonio and was planning to have a chill-week before me, Anna, and Alyssa venture to New Orleans.  When we got back from our trip Dominoes, the cow-spotted "middle-child" cat, was there to greet us all with her obnoxious meow.  Lightning and Fey weren't there, but we dismissed any worry from our minds, because Lightning often disappears for several days after we go on a trip, and this was Fey's first time home without us.  We figured she was acting like big brother Lightning.  It was Tuesday and we still hadn't seen Fey, and none of the neighbors had seen her since the Tuesday before. After calling and calling for her, one of the kids in the neighborhood found her under a tree.  Fey's back legs weren't working and she was obviously dehydrated.  They scooped her up brought her home, gave her water and food and got her comfy.  After getting hydrated get tail began to move a little, then one of her back legs.  Things looked bad, but she's a kitten and surely, we thought, she would be okay.  The vet said otherwise.  While at work, I got a call from Dad, who was crying. He told me they were going to have to put her down; she had a crushed pelvis, unfixable. I collapsed into tears and spent a good bit of time sitting on the floor of the staff bathroom cry. 

I only had Fey for about 9 months since October, but I loved her from the very beginning.  After Mischief died in August (after a long healthy cat life--13 years old). I didn't think I could love another cat so quickly.  Fey was a remarkable kitten. She loved books, not a reader but she loved to sleep and play on my book shelf. She also loved picture frames; she loved knocking over the same picture frames nearly everyday.  Most time she didn't like to cuddle, but every once in awhile she was a cuddly-kitten and wouldn't let you get more then 3 or 4 feet away from her.  There was many times that I had to let her sit in my bathroom while I was in the shower or she would cry.  Sometimes as she waited to me to get out the shower she would start crying, until I'd tell her "Don't worry Fey, I'm right here." And as soon as she heard or saw me peek through the shower curtain she would stop crying. 


I am going to miss her bringing in dead skinks and half dead birds. I am going to miss hiding ANYthing with a feather on it from her. And I am even going to miss her waking me up because she's crying about being lonely or her sleeping on top of me.




When we first got Fey, Anna used to say I'm going to cry when Baby-kitty grows into a cat.  Now, we are sorry that she never got the opportunity to grow up to be a beautiful black cat, and I think that is the worse thing about this. We had such a short time with this precious kitten.  It upsets me to think that there are thousands of unwanted cats in the area, and the one the had to be put down was the cat I wanted most in the world.

Once it was Fey that cried because she was lonesome and missed me, but now I'm the on crying for her.  I'll miss you, Fey.

One Ocean, a zoo, and a cave.

So, this past week has been super-duper busy.  SeaWorld, the San Antonio Zoo, botanical gardens, the Cave without a Name, and a cactus nursery.  To most this may seem like a field trip, but to me this is a vacation.

 When in SeaWorld we saw three different shows.  The first show was a combination of acrobats and animal tricks. It was called Azul and featured beluga whales and common dolphins (not to be confused with bottle-nosed dolphins, which to me seem to be more common).  This show had a lot of people and animals in it, the costumes where interesting and the animals just beautiful.  The second show, was a comedy using mostly otters and sea lions, but also a walrus at the end.  This one was most actors, but the animals were really cute and well-trained.  The best show by far was One Ocean, it was the biggest and most spectacular show. It had many orcas in it, and was just astonishing.  The trainers were not a part of the show, they were more like techies in a play, than actors.  This show's message was about oneness and how all things on earth are connected.  Each of us plays a role and our mistakes can effect the other "family members".   I thought that it was a good message, but that the show as a whole seemed preachy and not well delivered.


We also went to the San Antonio Zoo.  Being that I am a be fan of zoo, I have been to many, and this was defiantly one of the better zoos.  Everything was labeled very well, there were lots so of diversity in species.  Often times in zoo's "reptile" house there are other animals lumped in, like frogs, scorpions, and other creepy critters, but this zoo had a separate house for amphibians and reptiles, which I thought was a nice touch.  I really loved seeing the okapi because the are such unique and beautiful animals that many people don't even know they exist.  In their nocturnal house there was an intern who answered questions about the bats and they had night vision glass to view there animals through--which was very cool.  As far as zoos go I give this one an A+ and suggest that even if you are not an animal person if you are ever in San Antonio to visit this outstanding zoo.   


I am defiantly more of an animal person than a plant person, so the botanical garden was a little dull to me, plus the ba-zillion degree weather didn't help.  But, I did enjoy seeing bromeliads after going a project of them last semester for Plant Diversity Lab.  The orchids were also very pretty.  The cactus nursery was just a typical plant nursery with rows of plants waiting to be taken home.  Dad is like a kid a candy store at plant nurseries, and was about to find several cacti and succulents to take home to humid Monroe.

The final place we went to in San Antonio was the Cave without a Name.  This was the third cave I've been too, but the first for Catherine and Camille. The other cave I have visited were all in the Appalachian Mountains and this one was in the Hill of Texas so it was a bit different.  I think I appreciate caves more after taking several geology classes.  I especially enjoyed the animals that were down in the cave.  We saw two types of frogs--leopard frog and another type I'm not familiar with, and there was also a bat, but I don't know what time. It is just really cool to me that anything can live in a dark, stone world.

**Fun Fact: The only mammal where the female is normally taller than the male is the Okapi**

In hopes of meeting Shamu

Monday I, Clair Calhoun, will mark one more thing off my childhood bucket list.  We're going to sea world!!! Being the Bio Geek that I am, I'm super excited about seeing the dolphins, seals, and other marine animals. I very much hope that this won't be a disappointment, bc often time when ppl get to go somewhere they have wanted to go since they were a kid, it became hyped in the mind.

I hope that I learn more about the animals I encounter this week, and that my sisters appreciate them more. And I also hope we don't get kick out for Anna's dolphin impersonation.

Not only are we going to SeaWorld, we are also going to the Alamo, a botanical garden, and to a soccer game in Dallas. (Woo-hoo go FC DALLAS)  The Alamo seems like it'll be pretty boring--but that mostly is because its not the time in history that interests me the most.  The botanical garden should be good too as long as the weather in good.  We will do some other fun stuff too, of course I just don't really know what.

Did you know....?  A Killer Whale (Orca) is actually a dolphin.  Orcas are the biggest species of dolphin and are about the size of a school bus.